Nitpicking

I was just re-reading my post “misunderstood” and this brought to mind what my aunt said to me. She said that it seems as if I’ve got a bone to pick with not only people but something else. And then I also remembered what Joel and Kenric said to me on two seperate occassions. They both said that I like to make myself sound like the victim. How true are they? I wouldn’t know and it hurts me to think that I may be like Meishan…who plays the victim and drives people mad all the time. Tell me…do I really like to play the victim? I seriously don’t think I do so. I have to agree with my aunt to a certain extent though. Probably it’s because my life isn’t going the way that I want it to be and it’s all due to circumstances that I can’t control or change (although I could if I pressed on and make more enemies). I know that life’s not smooth sailing…but to be beaten down time and time again..it’s disheartening. Not only that, when you think you’re seeing some rays of hope, you get beaten down again. Go on…guess what exactly I mean. There are too many things that I can’t put to words. It’s je ne sais quoi. Not only that….it’s a long long history of stuff that I just don’t want to repeat. ahaha…there I go slipping into my melancholic mood. It’s going to be CNY! I should be celebrating and swinging from the chandeliers….